If you wonder if you are good enough or worry you are not, you are in the majority.
For some, trying to be good enough expresses itself in becoming a workaholic. For others, self-doubt manifests itself as procrastination, avoidance, or not finishing what you start.
Let me tell you a little secret: I was worried when I started my business.
- What if I wasn’t smart enough or talented enough to build a business?
- Would the business be a success?
- What if it didn’t work? Then what?
Regardless of how much I wanted everything to work and despite all the evidence of past success, I had plenty of doubts. There are still days I’m convinced that the success I’ve had thus far may just be a careful combination of luck and timing. We all grapple with the little voice inside who wants us to believe that we’re not good enough.
Why does the voice in our head say such things?
The “not good enough” voice emerges from:
- Constant comparison of our self to others.
- Perfectionism. The insane amount of pressure we put on ourselves to be perfect.
- Habitual response. A knee jerk reaction based upon a belief we harbor that we simply are not ready yet.
And, if we are brutally honest, just accepting the “not good enough” voice is a ready made excuse. It feels a lot easier and a lot less vulnerable to believe it’s true than taking action and making the changes we know we need to make.
For many, the “not good enough” voice thinks making a mistake is the worst possible outcome. Intellectually, we know we can learn a lot from the miscues we make and those experiences will eventually make us better. Regardless, some will remain paralyzed.
The fear of “not being good enough” affects everyone. In fact, a lot of high-achieving individuals believe they don’t deserve the success they have achieved, despite all the hard work put forth to achieve that success. They have what many psychologists call “imposter syndrome” and for some, they leverage that fear to push them further.
I use quiet time as a tool to help sort and filter my fears. Some avoid getting to know themselves out of fear they won’t like what they see. I have found a tremendous amount of value from journaling my personal thoughts, daily experiences, and evolving insights.
Here’s some advice: Recognize your “not good enough” story.
We all have a story regarding what we think we can’t do. Notice yours and resist the temptation to judge it. When we pause to reflect, even for a brief moment, we create the space to remind ourselves that our “not good enough” voice is just a soundtrack with minimal power.
Listening without attachment provides valuable information.
Subconsciously, we search for answers on how to change things on the outside when in reality, the answers we seek and the change we desire begins on the inside.
Effective leaders have self-reflecting moments. They consciously spend time noticing and deconstructing the stuff that sits in the way of “not being good enough.” Intellectually, they understand that courage isn’t about moving forward in the absence of fear, but instead finding the strength to move ahead in the presence of fear.
The next time your “not good enough” voice emerges, take a deep breath and whisper to yourself, “Ah, yes. I totally see how I’m listening to that old story, again.”
You are far wiser than any mistakes you’ve made.
You are far better than the moments you wish you could do differently.
You are worth more (inside and out) than you give yourself credit for. All of us are.
Still doubting yourself? Contact me and we will help you see that you are in fact, more than good enough!